Flagship blog of the Fortissimo Blog Group


Wong Renhao

Date of Birth:
28 August 1988

~Full time student
-St. Hilda's Primary
-Victoria School
-UB-SIM Ba. Comm.
~Part time software technician (Ba. ITech)
~Tenor-in-training, though it most probably won't work out
~CMI Grade 2 piano player
~Learning guitar

Friendster Public Profile

I'm in Ravenclaw!
be sorted @ nimbo.net

Email me!
Get your email icon here


[)1$(µ$$ 7#3 |\|37
Revelation of Grace
Journal of Influence


Chong Yi
CiPing & Wilbur
Denys & John
Jason Aw
Jon(athan) Sam(raj)
Lyrical Revelry
HRH Mano and her Blisters
Shu Yun
(Ying) Zhi


June 2004
July 2004
August 2004
October 2004
November 2004
December 2004
January 2005
February 2005
March 2005
April 2005
May 2005
June 2005
July 2005
August 2005
September 2005
October 2005
November 2005
December 2005
January 2006
February 2006
March 2006
April 2006
May 2006
June 2006
July 2006
August 2006
September 2006
October 2006
November 2006
December 2006
January 2007


Note: I will post using the name Renhao. Any other variation of my name or moi is not me.


Happy Helium New Year
Dumb norwegian blond
the flying lawnmower
Piece of Mind - Vancouver Film School (VFS)
Punishment in a haunted house -gaki no tsukai-
The Last Knit
chlorine and alcohol
The Tonight Show w/ Jay Leno -- Phony Photo Booth
Imperial Orchestra
Male Restroom Etiquette
Crazy Frog vs. Call On Me
Der Fuehrer's Face
School Rumble Clip
The Mind Of Mencia
Kotaro Oshio - Super Mario
Best card trick in the world
Whose Line Is It Anyway 26
Kotaro Oshio - Fight!!
Best of Peter
Another Funny Japanese Prank Show
Silent Library 3
Japanese Toilet Prank
Japanese Mission Impossible: Ski Resort spa prank
Family Guy Wheel of Fortune
Always Look on the Bright Side of Life
Miss Swan at a gay bar
Miss Swan (900)HOT-SWAN
Another David Copperfield
[Bakafish] Hard Gay Ramen English Subtitles
[Bakafish] Hard Gay Father's Day English Subtitles
Crazy Asian Mother by Erick Liang
English Conversation.
Teletubbies Uncensored
South Park Blame Canada
Jay Leno's Photobooth Prank 2
Jay Leno's Photobooth Prank 1
Steve Vai - Tender Surrender
Tatiana and Maxim Ice Skating
MJ's Choco Factory
Japanese Girls Freak Out
Funny Wake Ups
Boy Gets Scared
No More Wanking
Jesus Dancing Weird
Little Diva

Excited Pokemon Kid from Youtube.com

Podcasts and other stuff
Wednesday, June 29, 2005

Podcasts rule.


Here's the thing, ok, for the uninitiated. Podcasts are radio shows, basically, that are meant to be downloaded as mp3 files. This feature is the one that is the revolutionary part of it. Because we never have to miss a show again. And we can listen to the 7am news at 8am. And of course there are archives. Now certainly you can go visit the website and download it like one by one, but you can download special programs to automatically download it. Podcasts are acompanied by show notes, sort of a summary of the show.

First, an introduction to podcasting in general.
Wikipedia's article on Podcasting

Ok, the program to download automatically.
Now this program is particularly good because it's cross-platform, meaning you can use any kind of feed (.rss, .xml, .css, blah) without worrying about incompatibility. I use it. User-friendly too.

Right. Now here are two links so far to the two best podcasts I have heard so far. I stumbled upon them just picking podcasts off iTunes 4.9 to subscribe to.

Delta Park Project | Comedy Podcast
hosted by Jason Ruby and Anna Johns (husband and wife team)
Might be abit dry. I dunno. It's my kind of humour.


Ok anyway, moving right along...

Feast of Fools
hosted by Fausto Fernos and Marc Felion

Technically, it is comedy. Strictly, it's gay.

No no, as in, it's gay. Queer.

It's a splendid show hosted by a gay couple. And if you're getting turned off because of the word gay, you should be ashamed. It's a radio show, not an orgy for goodness' sake. Listen to them for their wit and humour.

Well I will be putting up more links as we go along, as time passes... As I get older...

In other news, I got a haircut from Speed today. My hair was making my head itch, and seeing me scratch my head when it's filled with millions of relatively long hair is not a pleasant sight. Neither is combing my hair.

The woman who cut my hair was probably on speed. She was totally lightning. Just cli-cli-cli-cli-click. And my hair was falling all over my face, body... And when I put on my specs again.


And she did some splendid double-talking, I suspect, that shut me up. Something like, yes of course if you ask me to make it short it has to be thinned isn't that no sideburns no layering this is how it would look like.

Fine. I'll just spike it or something. Or just leave it alone lah... At least I don't have to worry about it every like 10 minutes or so, starting from 6.45 in the morning.

Why me? Why me?!

orchestrated by Renhao at 10:23:00 pm
© 2004-2007. All rights reserved. You have been warned.

Radeon 9200
Tuesday, June 28, 2005


I am going to get it.

The Radeon 9200 graphics card, 128/64MB, with full Microsoft DirectX 8.1 compatability (can upgrade to DX 9.0c no problemo), AGP. Selling $79 at Challenger.

It's the most common and most compatible card around lah I guess. Star Wars Knights of the Old Republic II - The Sith Lords put that as their recommended card, so...

And according to the two helpful assistants there, my Intel integrated graphics card is utter bullshit.

Integrated ah... Integrated normally... is about 8MB?


So I have inferred that the only reason why I have been able to play Jedi Knight 2 Single Player is because my other specs push the performance up tremendously. 512 RAM and Pentium IV 2.6GHz processor. That is the only only reason why. Coupling these two with the mine-to-be graphics card it will be a wonderful gaming machine, if these men are correct in their information. Not the best, of course, but still good. And when I get it I will so thrash the JK2 MP bots' asses cos I AM TOO FAST FOR THEM. DIE SUCKERS.

Not compatible or got any problems just return it. Don't spoil the packaging.

Very good.

Priorities shift-
Harry Potter 6 >> Graphics card >> Guitar

Because according to Ben, for a classical guitar a $200+ one is good enough. OK lor. Plus the year end sales it'll be no problem. If I save conscientiously.

orchestrated by Renhao at 5:49:00 pm
© 2004-2007. All rights reserved. You have been warned.

Star Wars Fanfilms
Sunday, June 26, 2005

Well I have linked those of you who have bothered to The Darth Side, now here are a couple of excellent fanfilms I've seen.

Mark Thomas and David Macomber's Duality
in DivX-Windows Media Player
Quicktime small
Quicktime large

I recommend Quicktime large for clearest quality, and DivX for best compatibility on a common program. Download DivX here. Player optional.

The Ho Brothers' Art of the Saber

Click Finished Project. Best not to make your Quicktime screen too big, or you might miss the fun.

Shane Felux's Star Wars: Revelations

This will of course take quite long. 47min, 254MB. But for 47min of fun why not? As for the mirrors, best use xFire either way (quicktime only it seems).

I give up. I have just seen so many fanfilms I must give up. Here is an index at TheForce.net. If your Internet and Win Media Player can take it, go for Sith Apprentice. Absolutely hilarious. Warning though: I have a 512 connection and WMP 10. And it keeps having to load up. So good luck to you. Enjoy.

orchestrated by Renhao at 11:15:00 am
© 2004-2007. All rights reserved. You have been warned.

Saturday, June 25, 2005

Morning was free and home alone today so I played Jedi Knight 2 Single Player. The new GunZ cannot work, neither can this JK2 multiplayer, neither can the new game, I should think, from Softnyx, Rakion. Looks to be a good game. Ryan's gonna pass me Battlefield 1942. If Kaiyan's right it should work on my stupid integrated Intel graphics card, which is the cause of all my problems. Just ruins this otherwise highly efficient computer. I lurve my 512 RAM.

Met my mom at the bank where she works at and ate the free bee-hoon tasting mee siam and the I-dunno-what-you -call-it. Some fried thing in the family of 'money bags', samosa, ngor hiang... Bank was having a roadshow, you could eat the food if you came in to listen about their high interest rates of 0.75% p.a., and the bank manager just told us to eat.

Ok lor.

After that went to aunt's place. The new tenants were coming so we had to clear off the last remnants of her existence there. I watched some sci-fi show, and then Judging Amy, good show. Consequently I left my Econs, English, Hamlet, and 蜡笔小新 untouched... Well I did stare at the pictures from English for awhile on the train, as well as Econs, and read the first three frames of 蜡笔小新 and a couple of pages of Hamlet... The only one with progress was Hamlet. The rest, might as well not touch. Tenants came in... Wow man, wow. They came here because they were all doing their honours in their Bachelor of Arts in Musical Theatre at Laselle-SIA. Singers! Anyway, they pretty much daoed me.

Went to have dinner at Plaza Parkroyal... Made myself so darn full... Spread was good though. Sirloin, california hand rolls, glutinous rice, potato salad, cheap shark's fin, ha cheong gai (chicken with prawn paste), roti prata with all sorts of fillings... Banana, durian, sardines, egg. There's more. Can't be bothered to think.

No church tomorrow, because 1) we couldn't really be bothered with guest speakers, and 2) I do have some work to complete. So... Late night up ahead.

orchestrated by Renhao at 10:28:00 pm
© 2004-2007. All rights reserved. You have been warned.

Amantes sunt amentes
Friday, June 24, 2005

Lovers are lunatics. That's what it means. And you know what I mean, you two. Cheer up.

Today I thought, like Ben, that I would skip Maths consultation, but I went late in the end. 40 min late. On the way, I saw this woman coming back from exercise. She was sporting one of those skin-tight wool-looking shorts, and she had a not too obvious but still prominent camel's toe. If you don't know what a camel's toe is, then you won't unless you go search it on Yahoo's image search. Turn your Safesearch off and make damn sure your parents aren't anywhere near. I quickly looked away... The last memory of infected eyes was horrid enough, much less the thought of another one.

Met Samantha on the way at the interchange. We had a lively chat about literature and school. Ah it's always nice to have someone with the same core interests as you. I always appreciate it, because my greatest passions are hardly found in other people anymore.

After we finished consultation we went for pool, as I had predicted the day before. I told Ryan I might not want to go for maths 'tomorrow' because I knew we would kill time by going to Mambo. True enough... more or less mastered the body-lowering. Now its angling, calculating angles, and a whole host of other things I wouldn't even bother to bore you to death with.

Econs... I could barely catch up. Lucky Kaijie was beside me, otherwise... *shudder*.

orchestrated by Renhao at 8:33:00 pm
© 2004-2007. All rights reserved. You have been warned.

Piano Practice
Thursday, June 23, 2005

Whoo... nothing like a good exercise on the piano. It's like 10 minutes after I closed the lid and I am still breathing heavily. And I only played for 15-20 minutes.

Rigorous hein?

Für Elise, and the First Movement of Clementi's Sonatina in C (major) opus 36 no. 3. You won't need to know Für Elise's tune. If you do you are the saddest case in the world. but here's a link to the Clementi piece. Except if you have Windows Media Player 10 crank the speed up to 1.6x, that's my speed. If not, just imagine it one-and-a-half-times as fast. My need for speed. Für Elise you can just crank it to 1.3, 1.4... I just use wider dynamics that's all. Want to hear me play?$?$?$?

Yes these two pieces give the adrenalin. The power I experience when I manage to pull off a tricky passage can hardly be recreated anywhere else. The problem is I make the most jarring mistakes. Even after playing for like 6 months. So be prepared if you want me to play for you.

orchestrated by Renhao at 9:48:00 pm
© 2004-2007. All rights reserved. You have been warned.

Midterm Results Part Three
Wednesday, June 22, 2005


B- for English.

How could this happen?

Who cares?

Sort of expected it, so no comment except I hope I do better in reaction essays than compare and contrast.

orchestrated by Renhao at 7:49:00 pm
© 2004-2007. All rights reserved. You have been warned.

Midterm Results Part Two
Tuesday, June 21, 2005


Mrs James decided to save our test papers and results for tomorrow's consultation. So we have that delayed... If my questions and her answers were anything to go by...

Me: How did we do for the test?
She: Good.
Me: How did I do for the test?
She: [fiddle with her stuff for awhile] Good.

Couldn't tell whether she was sarcastic or not.

She told us early birds to give others a chance to go early, so Ryan and I decided on the 12.30 slot. We are so going to be ultra sianed in between. But I borrowed another three books from the library... Hamlet, Hamlet discussion, and American satirical essays. That should keep me busy for that time.

Maths. Jaffar gave us our results one by one. First person.

Wong Renhao? Who is Wong Renhao?


68/80, hmmm, alright. Nothing special. Ben got 66 so as he adequately puts it you beat me in two subjects leh. Friends forever Ben. I lost half a mark in my first quiz and he lost to me in midterm by 2 marks. That puts us exactly on par, at 88.33333333333...%. So I consulted the course outline.

Hey, we're both A-'s!
Really? [look at paper] Alright man!

Then Ben said, 'If I get another two marks... [calculate], i will get A!'

Luckily Jaffar refused, haha. In fact apart from calculational errors (which would have been very embarrassing considering his job) I think he flatly refused anyone any extra marks. And I won't be surprised if some honest guy came up to him and pointed out extra marks and he said, 'Never mind just keep the marks. For being honest.' That would be soooo him.

After lesson went to eat with Ben and His Excellency Yeo Kaijie, who by no coincidence thrashed all our asses in Econs and Maths. The two four-credit subjects. Jeez... Why does Music have to be a three-credit subject?!!!

In other news, Li Rong, who is also in New Creation Church (that's where she got her lovely 恩 T-shirt, too) told me about the SIM care-group. She saw me first when I was waiting to watch Star Wars again with Sandra-jie and the rest. She stood at the entrance of the cinema and yelled, 'Renhao!'. I very nearly put my hands up.
Speaking of which George who is also in this SIM care-group and who first contacted me hasn't spoken to me for a long time. When I am feeling happy and bo liao I shall SMS him.

My mom bought the revolutionary Osim iEcologi. The salesman was rather efficient in his demo, and so was the machine in doing its job. Mom is vacuuming now, but last time I saw she had water all over when it was supposed to leave a clean dry tile, with perhaps a bit of fast-evaporating condensation. As for myself, I will want to do a clean up of my study room chair, and my bed if mom's not having it on her mind yet. The two dirtiest places on earth. Eugh. And perhaps more nooks and crannies if I can find them.

Off to the piano now...

orchestrated by Renhao at 6:36:00 pm
© 2004-2007. All rights reserved. You have been warned.

Midterm Results Part One
Monday, June 20, 2005

Econs just totally ruined my day. Screwed up. Fucked up.

Shit man, just when I thought I got a comfortable grasp on the concepts, I get a scrape-through pass, 30/50=60%. If you don't already know that is the minimum passing percentage to achieve in American standards, and that's considered a disgrace with average students already. Overall, I still got only 62.5%, which is shit in its purest vilest form.

On the other hand, my Music got full marks. So it's of course easy to tell other people to chill and don't worry about their results, because you don't have to worry yourself. You wouldn't know their disappointment.

Today Hans fell into hysterical laughing fits two times.
The first was a bright start to our day. Daphne had given him a piece of guitar tabbed lyrics and asked if he knows how to play it. Ben quipped, 'He can shred this thing!' And Daphne was suddenly worried and said, 'Oh no please don't!...' Shredding in guitarist lingo is running the frets in chromatic runs. A chromatic run is, for a more understandable example, playing every key, black and white, without skipping, very fast, on the piano. And when Hans heard my correction he just burst out laughing so hard, and banging the table with his hands, and then making frantic mad sounds and tearing up invisible paper. So comical. Ben and I were like laughing ourselves speechless.
Second one was when we were playing with the Duracell bunny I'd gotten for Ben as a joke. When we failed to keep the stupid rabbit on its feet, I called to Hans and propped the bunny up. 'Bunny!...' and it slowly toppled face down, 'can't stand!' And once again Hans Ben and I were laughing our asses off. Hans laughed until he had tears in his eyes. But don't worry if you don't get the joke. Requires abit of inferences and thinking if you're not part of our group. For a giveaway hint read my previous posts.

Except for Econs, we all make a great clique. And I don't expect the Econs problem to last. Grrr...

Didn't help that I only finished the History of Voice essay at 2.30 last night. The fatigue added to my depression today after Econs.

orchestrated by Renhao at 5:46:00 pm
© 2004-2007. All rights reserved. You have been warned.

Mace Windu Force FX Lightsaber
Sunday, June 19, 2005

Why?! Why is it always me? WHYYYYYYYYY?!?!?!?!?!?!

I just checked with Popcorn Pop, the movie memorabilia shop, regarding the Mace Windu lightsaber. It's what I've always wanted! A real (well, almost real) working violet lightsaber. I saw it on Master Replicas and was gushing to Bertrand about it. So here's what they said.

Me: Yea, I'd like to check... I understand your Force FX collection has a Mace Windu one now...?
Girl: Yes we do, we are expecting them soon.
Me: Oh ok. So can I expect to have continous stock until September, December?
Girl: Oh well, it's actually a one-shipment thing. Cause we have to order in bulk, not just one or two.
Me: I see I see... And how many Mace Windus are you expecting?
Girl: Oh three.
Me: *fuck* Thank you!

Why me lah?! Why me?!

orchestrated by Renhao at 6:23:00 pm
© 2004-2007. All rights reserved. You have been warned.

Have you ever?
Saturday, June 18, 2005

Have you ever:

1. snuck out of the house (when I was home alone)
2. gotten lost in a city
3. seen a shooting star
4. had a serious surgery
5. gone out in public in my pajamas (lol sleeping clothes not jammies)
6. kissed a stranger
7. hugged a stranger
8. been in a fist fight
9. been arrested
10. laughed and had milk/coke green tea come out of my nose
11. pushed all the buttons on an elevator
12. swore at my parents
13. been in love
14. been close to love
15. been to a casino
16. been skydiving
17. broken a bone
18. been high
19. skinny-dipped
20. skipped school
21. flashed someone
22. seen a therapist
23. played spin the bottle (truth or dare lah... who hasn't)
24. gotten stitches
25. drank a whole gallon of milk/water in one hour (probably...)
26. bitten someone
27. been to Disneyland
28. gotten the chicken pox
29. kissed a member of the same sex
30. crashed into a friend's car
31. been to Japan
32. ridden in a taxi
33. shoplifted
34. been fired
35. had a crush on someone of the same sex
36. had feelings for someone who didn't have them back (you have no idea boy, no idea)
37. stolen something from my school
38. gone on a blind date
39. lied to a friend
40. had a crush on a teacher
41. celebrated mardi-gras in new orleans
42. been to Europe
43. slept with a co-worker
44. been married
45. gotten divorced
46. had children
47. seen someone die
48. had a close friend die
49. been to Africa
50. driven over 400 miles in one day
51. been to Canada
52. been to Mexico
53. been on a plane
54. seen the Rocky Horror Picture Show
55. thrown up in a bar
56. purposely set a part of myself on fire
57. eaten Sushi
58. been snowboarding and skiing
59. met someone in person from the internet
60. lost a child
61. gone to college
62. graduated college
63. done hard drugs
64. tried killing myself
65. fired a gun
66. purposely hurt myself
67. taken painkillers
68. miss someone right now
69. tried to wash away some feelings by banging myself on the wall


Courtesy of Bertrand's blog post.

orchestrated by Renhao at 10:34:00 pm
© 2004-2007. All rights reserved. You have been warned.


Once upon a time, when yours truly was in primary school, I was made in charge of setting up and keeping the mic during and after recess respectively. Let me explain.

We were made to line up in our classes after recess so that we could be sent back to our classes in some orderly fashion. To do so a teacher will leture us for a few minutes, then dismiss us class by class, one from each level at one go. To reserve her voice for class later she would use a mic. This is where I come in.

Everyday once I've finished eating I would pop into the General Office to dig a mic out of a tangled mess of several mics and wires. Then I will simply plug it up to the port, test test, and leave it on the floor. After we were dismissed I would simply unplug it, roll up the wire and return it to that dreadful mess in the General Office. So one day I happened to stroll in after keeping the mic at the same time as a few other boys. I knew these boys, they were notorious around school for misbehaving. I never knew exactly what crime they did that day, and even if I had overheard I forgot. But the whole purpose of this story is to tell you about my principal, a no-hope-of-marrying spinster. Her name? Foo Pee Pee.

When you've gotten over your laughing and mocking someone else's carelessly selected name... Thank you.

Ms Foo had a pig face by the way.

When you're finished laughing and mocking someone else's idiotic face... Thank you.

Oh I tell you she was sadistic. She had this I'm-gonna-whip-your-virgin-ass-soooo-hard-you-will-cry-hey-mamaaaaa! look on her face that day.

'Come in, come in...' she crooned cordially to her victims, holding the door to the GO open.

So I was there keeping the mic while she was lecturing them, and as I walked to the door, she said, 'Where are you going?'

And I was like major 'HUH?!'

'Aren't you with them?'

'No I was just... keeping the mic...'

'Hmmm... go go go.'


The end.

orchestrated by Renhao at 4:48:00 pm
© 2004-2007. All rights reserved. You have been warned.

My Key Signature

Eb major - you are warm and kind, always there for your friends, who are in turn there for you. You are content with your comfortable life and you are currently achieving; if you keep in this state you will go far.

what key signature are you?
brought to you by Quizilla

Hmmm I'm also an E-flat Major? Like Xuan Wei... But we seem so different... Ah haven't talked to him for a long time anyway...

Sian diao just remembered my music assignment's due Monday. I'll have to spend the rest of today doing it. It doesn't help that I am writing on voice (write about an instrument and its origins blah blah). Took me effectively two hours just to weed out four sites from the internet. Lucky they have more links in the websites I shortcutted. I'm probably gonna bitch about the wonder of castrati.

Voice is difficult to research. You have been warned.

orchestrated by Renhao at 4:04:00 pm
© 2004-2007. All rights reserved. You have been warned.

Midterm Part Twee
Friday, June 17, 2005

I rule.

Yesterday I made up my mind to do some serious study for Econs so that I would kick the paper's ass tomorrow (yesterday's tomorrow = today). I ended up surfing around on the Net and sleeping at about 1am, after doing some major adding on Friendster.

Today I made it a point to do some quick revision in hope of kicking ass later (this morning's later = this afternoon). I ended up reading my email.

So finally I left the house got onto the train and read the summary she gave us. I just love copying the right stuff down.

Got to the Rec Room, and sure enough they were there - Ben, William, Eko, Kaiyan.
Took out supplementary notes.
Settled down.
Ben said, 'Ok lah, eh let's go.'

I didn't have much to argue though, because it was already 1.30pm. Paper was at 2.

Lee Chin Choo warned us if we wanted to go to the gents or ladies we had better do so now. So I went with Ben. Elton was originally with us, but for some abstract reason he chickened out when we had to go to another toilet because the nearest one was being flooded out by the cleaners. Ben went out first then I heard 'Hello!' then 'Hello!!!'. Walked out and said, '一听就知道...'. And Jill turned around and squealed 'Hello darling!!!'

The storm clouds that formed over Ben's head contained enough power to annihilate anyone into powder within a 10-metre radius.

I patted him on the way out of the door.

In the room, I kept crossing paths with Jill while worming my way to the table. I swear it wasn't intentional. I thought she was trying to be funny... Either way she pouted and said, 'Why you keep blocking me so irritating...' I gave her a why-me look and she floated off. Funny girl...
And for the most part of it, Econs was ok, except the last question about total revenue and the use of price elasticity of demand. I won't waste our time repeating the questions.

After that we went to the Rec Room... And we found out why.

On the board was a message, along with an all-too-familiarly shaped packet.

Someone threw this cigarette pack down one of the holes causing the balls to jam. Please do not do this in consideration for others thanks.

And sitting on the marker ledge was an empty Viceroy cigarette packet.

Later the same security guard as yesterday came in with that... ... fucked up sheriff look again. And this time he asked which programme we were from.

If the guys are ok with it, I am so going to ask him straight in the face what the hell is wrong next time. For today I just complained about the prices. They increased it to $2 per game, the greedy bastards.

After that Kaiyan suggested Laserquest, but we all had stuff to do, so another day, much to Kaiyan's disappointment I think. Anyway I also had not enough money.

Went with Alex, Eko and William to Clementi to eat. Alex said he could see lovely foodcourts from the MRT station, but all he brought us to was a dying hawker centre. Poor things there were so desperate they had to shamelessly advertise. But I have to admit the chicken rice I ate was splendid.

After that and after much argument pool at Snookerium. I was desperate today lah. That place is the worst shit I've ever been to. Learnt bridging again from William, and earlier Hans taught me about different vertical positions of impact from the cue to cueball affecting its movement and subsequent transfer of energy. Medium-high to centre shots are power shots. Medium-low shots are follow up shots. Ultra low shots are of course jumps. Why the hell am I revealing power tips like this?

Decided to slack for the weekend in celebration of the completion of my midterms. Sandra-jie said she would talk to Dad about the guitar tomorrow. Love you man... Cross your fingers.

orchestrated by Renhao at 12:25:00 pm
© 2004-2007. All rights reserved. You have been warned.

Midterm Part Twu
Thursday, June 16, 2005

Maths... Overall the questions were straightforward, not much of a challenge thank God but still gave me joy to solve them satisfactorily. Found out later though, that my whole quadratic sketching was way off, so that's five marks gone. Plus the stupid two mark domain question that caught me off guard. When I've been revising that same question like from yesterday. Because the class was so big, and it was Jaffar invigilating, one could clearly hear things coming from behind like 'What's the final answer ah?'

Salut, mein frau.

I walked out of the room one freaking hour early, with Kaijie. Followed by Graham, then Elton... Ben and Hans took an eternity in there, because they were apparently stoned on question five, limits, when I like totally owned that question. We finally met up for a couple of games of pool in the Rec Room, which is by the way turning into a meeting place. Our clique just gets drawn there. In fact today we met by accident. Wheee...

At some point Hans explained about the uses of a couple of weapons. The shin-ja-ku, something like this you should get the picture, is used as a shield-weapon when you're cornered, allowing you to advance forward. Chimpanzee sounds help alot too. Ben was a total arse when he cued one of the marker caps into the pool table hole. Later Hans Kaiyan and me were stoning around while Hans used Kiayan's laptop to do his Friendster admin when a du-lan looking security guard came in and eyed us like a sheriff when he corners that criminal with a $10,000 tag on his head. We bitched about the missing cue balls and all that, and he gave a what-you-want-me-to-do shrug and left. Stupid dick...

Econs tomorrow, and then we're free! Kaiyan suggested we played Laserquest, that thing where you go round shooting people with electronic guns the size of Men-In-Black rifles. Quite expensive, though. We set it tentatively for Monday, after Music, provided enough people want to go.

orchestrated by Renhao at 6:51:00 pm
© 2004-2007. All rights reserved. You have been warned.

Midterm Part Vun
Wednesday, June 15, 2005

Music is best expressed in Hans' words.

If I don't get full marks, it is a careless mistake.

English is best expressed in Ben's words.

I think I'll get a C. I got this feeling I'd get a C.

B lah, not C for me. I hope. I didn't really think much during my planning, just kept vomitting ideas as my essay went along, then filled in the blanks in my planning at the end.

In between we had a few great games of pool in the Rec(tum) Room, cos the cue balls were finally back. Today it was my turn to screw up the breaking, and Ben as usual didn't live up to his self-proclaimed Marksman title for the better part of the games, but he still did a few beauties, as well as plenty of tycos. WAHAHA.

Econs was great. Besides the fact that I actually understood concepts, we cracked more jokes about Ben's darl. But today's jokes have to be censored due to its sensitive nature, so that's that... Sitting beside Hans really helped in both ways... He could explain whatever I couldn't catch in Econs, as well as come up with jokes dirtier than mine. Old bird ah Hans... I'm still a young gun, a freshman, brand new. Except someone pulled out my firing pin.

Ok ok never mind. This is getting stupid.

PS - showed Ben my flashlight today. Dished out the usual warning of don't point it at yourself. He said oh ok, then in the next five seconds stunned himself with the show-white glory of my 32 diodes.

You'd expect an 11-pointer to utilise more of his grey matter.

orchestrated by Renhao at 7:42:00 pm
© 2004-2007. All rights reserved. You have been warned.

Fire at Will
Tuesday, June 14, 2005

Whoa... today. Today was barrage after barrage of incidents that sent us into total laughing fits. Two times I laughed tears into my eyes. Two a day... unusual.

Day started out not too good with English. Daphne and me got a B- in our essay... I hope to work it up to at least at least A-. Catherine got an A... José produced a stunning A+... And Ryan got D because he didn't do enough contrasting. Can't blame him, his dad and him are rather similar, according to him. At least Mrs. James is giving him another chance.

Then we got to the Rec Room after lunch... And on my excellent suggestion played 9-ball with the other unused balls, because the stupid cue ball was missing. Like Elton said, 'Anyone wants to call management?' Abit dry lah his humour, no one laughed. Ryan did some spectacular fouls, me only a couple of stupid ones. Ben was like, 'Ryan, you're with the Marksman.' Then when he sent the 'cue ball' rolling weakly he panicked and yelled,' Bring the ball baaack!!!' Haha smart ass... In fact, he practically screwed up the whole game haha. Moving right along...
While we were playing John and Freddy and Bernard and Melvin were playing darts. Melvin was like showing his butt to distract Bernard's concentration... Which basically never really... Ah never mind never mind. Anyway Bernard lost and had to do 50 sit-ups.

Then after that we were playing soccer with Melvin when he got Bernard to join him to operate the goalkeeper... But when it came to defending his hole (that didn't quite sound right... anyway) he turned his pole (WTBF am I saying) very lightly, so that more than anything his keeper was floating upwards instead of kicking the ball. Melvin shouted exasperatedly, 'Eh what you doing, tai chi ah? OOI you're supposed to pass it over HERE HERE HERE not play with the ball.' Lucky I was sitting out, otherwise I wouldn't have been able to play for the next five minutes. Sponsored quite a few games... Did a few power shots too. The ball was just an orange blur then I start cheering liao.

Laugh number 2 was during Maths. We were trying to catch Syed's (Jaffar's) funny phrases. Elton was like bloody irritating, everytime tap me say, 'You follow?' KNN... Graham managed to capture something on his voice recorder function on his HP, I forgot... I asked him if he had caught 'massage' part yet. He shook his head, and said, 'Someday...' LOL. Then ooohh, the fun part.
Ben pang seh again to sit with Jill. They went out of the LT four times during our lesson. What's more when he came back he look ultra spent... We at the otherside were all coming up with the funniest jokes on the planet... Ben was posing with an army uniform, and then Hans said, 'Eh Ben... Make love ah, not war.' I was out of breath for like 20 seconds. I came up with quite a few myself... I imitated the Duracell bunny, always going never stopping... then later I rememebered I still had one battery left from yesterday's torch, so I showed it to him. In his words, 'I was like pengz~'. Lol. Then right after 'make love not war' I shot him with, 'Fire at will.' That one we were out of breath for 30 seconds. There were plenty other jokes... I just can't remember, they weren't as outstanding as the mentioned ones.
And then Jill and I were hand-signing to each other all over the place. I created a rectangle which was supposed to mean room... flatted my hands and move them forwards palm down (bed) and did this thing from Meet the Fockers, gripping my thumb with my other hand and pulling my thumb out. I'll leave that to your imagination. Jill interpreted as, 'A box... open up... take you (Ben) out?'

She is such a funny girl.
And you know what she replied?
Wave hand - no
point to Ben
'Cannot play with me or Ben will break your dick?!?!?!'

Turns out Ben lamented, 'Renhao bully me', so she replied with 'Cannot bully my darling or I break your neck.'


Kaiyan printed some picture of an ultra fat guy who looks like me... Three copies, and sent it all over the place. I took the last blank one from him and scribbled, love and kisses, then a phony signature, then at Hans' suggestion, because Jill wanted to see it, XOXO in red ink. She sent it back with this message penciled on the back.

To: My lover boy. Haha. You look so cuteee... in this pic. Love ya! Muackhszxs...

She gives the noisiest kisses, that's all I can say. I won't bother to mention the words on the other two. Mine was the wittiest. The rest were like misguided attempts to be funny.

11 o'clock. I still haven't studied 5ths and key signatures for Music midterm tomorrow, as well as haven't revised English. better go. Love ya all. Muackhszxswshpft... [eww...]

orchestrated by Renhao at 11:00:00 pm
© 2004-2007. All rights reserved. You have been warned.


Interesting incident on the train.

I was sleeping and I suddenly found myself consciously sinking into this never before experienced state of calm and quiet. It was so silent and still it was unnerving. But I was curious, so I tried to hold myself down in that state, but I just boobed back up helplessly after awhile.

What does this mean?

orchestrated by Renhao at 8:50:00 am
© 2004-2007. All rights reserved. You have been warned.

Monday, June 13, 2005

I don't usually associate words like this in my vocabulary. I'm elitist. Sue me.

Ah today today... Today was an interesting day. Music as usual was getting rather frustrating for Ms. Ching because of the Year 2's (and Year 1's to a lesser extent, to be fair)... So noisy. Sitting with Ben is a revelation when it comes to guitars, and if you happen to be a newbie. But you must be able to absorb ideas and styles fast, because he makes little difference between newbies and bandmates.

So we sat through music... Like 5min into the lesson we were totally sian diao. But at least we paid attention. I think.

For consultation Ben got Jill to sit with us. Hmmm I wonder what's going on between them... Even one of his girl's friends mistook him for putting his hand around her shoulder! Girls I tell you... Pa jiao. On the way I saw a beauty. A sleek 32-bulb white-light LED torch. Cost? $27.


It required about a whole hour of strolling around the level and browsing in MPH to convince myself it was worth the buy. And I got it.

It wasn't worth the buy. It is worth the buy. It can shine a stunning 15 metres across, creating a faint but distinct spotlight on the opposite block. Yum yum. Only thing I almost bashed myself when I saw smaller and of course cheaper ones for sale at a stall in Tampines. But when I came back... Salaqadoodah... $30 lying neatly tucked under my file. I looked at my brother.

'Koomah was here wasn't she?'

We exchanged a secret smile.

God works in mysterious ways. But the matter of the fact is, he works. Hallelujah and amen.

orchestrated by Renhao at 9:34:00 pm
© 2004-2007. All rights reserved. You have been warned.

Inspiration or Obsession?
Saturday, June 11, 2005

I knew I would be a good pianist. But look at me now.

I knew I would be a good actor. Look what's happened to me now.

I knew I would be a good singer. See what I am now.

I know I will be a good guitarist. What will become of me in the end?

Dream after dream, I am shattered.

Hope after hope, will I be left broken?

Who am I? Do I serve no purpose on this Earth? Am I destined to just live and die on this Earth? This filthy, rotten, polluted, sinful Earth?

Why am I cursing this Earth? I possess filthy thoughts. I have a rotten body. My mind is polluted. I am sinful.

Why am I cursing this Earth?

Or are the answers just behind the curtain, the Iron Curtain of filth, decay, pollution and sin? Painfully obvious, yet playfully subtle?

Or will I realise on my deathbed, with tears in my eyes, that too late, far too late, have I learnt, to just let all around you fade away, drop away, to serve God alone, and let his rewards come to you naturally?

Why me?

orchestrated by Renhao at 4:45:00 pm
© 2004-2007. All rights reserved. You have been warned.

Few Things... Interview with an Angel

Yes, just a few things before I commence on my little inspiration piece... I shall be using a borrowed guitar after all! Oh, God works in mysterious ways. I was just in Yamaha, looking at the guitars, when Sandra姐 called to confirm that she had bought the tix for Star Wars Ep 3 for Sunday (which means of course I'm watching it twice yahaha). And I told her about wanting to learn guitar and even about Graham's planned guitar lessons next term. And lo and behold she told me that she still did have a guitar, a... well I don't know the proper term, so let's call it a pluggable classical guitar (or maybe nylon). Either way I don't have to worry about steel strings cutting my fingers... What I do have to worry about is rearranging the strings for left hand guitar. Just the thought makes me shudder... Still I told her I would return it to her someday, when I get a decent guitar. Now that I have one already I guess I can take my time to save up for one good one. And maybe wait till year-end for the slasher sale at Paradis's guitar shop. 40% off you know. That means if let's say I save $10 minimum every week till late November/early December, I will have about $350 on my hands. With this money and the discounting I can get a guitar actually worth about [$350/60%X100%=] $580. Middle, perhaps, middle-high range? Not bad, not bad at all... An obvious condition was that I take excellent care of it. Treat it as my wife, as they say. Don't treat it like my last guitar... anyhow fall, crash, bang... No wonder she dropped her bridge and committed suicide.

On second thought, I shall write my little interview with an angel out first... Expect it by sunday night, most probably earlier.

Mmmm...亲爱的老婆, hurhur... *salivate*

orchestrated by Renhao at 1:19:00 am
© 2004-2007. All rights reserved. You have been warned.

Late Night with Wong Renhao
Thursday, June 09, 2005

My essay was due today.

I still hadn't completed it at 11pm yesterday.

Relax. My English isn't failing. It's just that
1) it's an academic essay, which isn't really my cup of tea
2) I've been staring at it for the past week every blasted day, until I've numbed to it.

So desperate to get some rest I went to bed at 11+. I set my alarm clock at 2.30am, and my handphone alarm clock at 2.45am. I prove to myself that an alarm clock's beeping is more effective than a handphone's vibration, which makes the phone sound like it has constipation, when I shuff it under my pillow.

When I woke up, I found my brother watching TV. I contemplated the consequences of alerting him to my prescence, and then I unjammed the door and closed it. True enough he opened the door a few minutes later, giving me that stupid grin. After I daoed him for like 30 seconds he beat his ass out of the room, but as usual didnt close the damn door properly. I opened it a crack to shoot him an angry vampire look before closing the door with a soft bang. And locking it as an afterthought. And there, I shall spare the grisly details, I found my inspiration to push a 700+ word essay to a 1000+ word essay. I know, I could have written more, but like I said, I was so totally sian diao I simply couldn't think of anything more. I thought of staying all the way thru morning, because it was already 4.30+ anyway. But I could feel sleepiness lingering in my bones so I went to sleep. Then I discovered.

I couldn't sleep.

Lucky it was only for a while. I would have fallen asleep a little earlier, but just as I was happily drifting off into unconsciousness the alarm clock rang over the other side for 5. I was like, why the blue hell did Dad turn his alarm on when no one had to wake at 5? And then next thing my mom shook me up at 6.45... Renhao late already late already... Lucky I bathed at... what... four plus. So I just changed and out of the house. It's a miracle I managed to sit through English and even Maths without falling asleep. Was like unconscious on the train on the way back until I forced myself to get up from my seat. I was sandwiched and I didn't want to KO on either shoulder to my sides because they are both wrinkled. I'm so bad.

Anyway I crashed at home... Took a 3 hour nap. Dreamless. Just short out and then three hours later reconnect battery. Missed 绝对 Superstar cos my mom didn't wake me up. Shit sia... Oh well. As long as I don't miss Hans's interview I'm fine.

Actually this post was meant to come out much earlier. I was waiting for English consultation to start, and was writing about how Ryan was singing Phantom of the Opera at full volume and prancing about like Willy Wonka... but the friggin internet failed at the last moment.

orchestrated by Renhao at 5:31:00 pm
© 2004-2007. All rights reserved. You have been warned.

An Incident
Sunday, June 05, 2005

Just a short note to recount an incident I hadn't had the opportunity of recounting. Happened about two weeks or a week back I think...

I was on the bus, standing, when this old lady, wrinkled and slightly hunchbacked if I remember, took out a bottle of standard golden-brown medicated oil. She inverted the bottle over her finger that was stopped against the bottle mouth, and then smeared her upper lip with the oil on her hand, the area . Now I don't know what happened with the inverting and all, but as a result the lady put on herself a moustache of oil, with its excess collecting in a droplet at the side of her lip. We really should give credit to these people for setting fashion trends. Soon Clinique and CD will be coming up with upper lip gloss - the glittering moustache you've always wanted! And it'll come in a rectangular bottle with the founder's face in black-and-white and looking like he was baptised in tom yam. Yum yum...

orchestrated by Renhao at 5:11:00 pm
© 2004-2007. All rights reserved. You have been warned.

C'est Buellshite
Saturday, June 04, 2005

1) I am having a cold. No fever, thank God, but I have been sniffing all day. All the sneezing and blowing and wiping my nose are making my nostrils raw.

2) It has been a rather trying week for my friends' and my emotions. So many things have been happening since my last entry. It didn't really help that we had another round of tests this week for all four subjects. A quick summary before other news. Stay tuned...

Music - should be able to get full marks again unless I made a careless mistake. Drawing the quarter rest, however, was a bitch. I just couldn't get it right. See it here. We're not expected to draw this, we just draw a small 'flag' on top of a sort of 'three' with its edges sharpened. Oh forget it.
Maths - full marks if no careless mistakes. Shouldn't be though, because I confirmed my answers with the two guys I was sitting in between. Don't you just love maths?
Econs - wahaha works out to an overall pass. 6/12 + 10/12 = 16/24 = 66.7%
English - Eurgh. Literature style read-and-answer. Straightforward of course, compared to Lit, but we shall have to wait and see about the marks.

Okay, that dare wasn't funny. Not at all ok? I know, I was laughing and giggling with my friends. But was the bloody hell is the meaning of sending your friend to ask for my number and happily throw in 'cos I think you're cute and handsome'? What, is this your smart idea of revenge? Cute and handsome... peuh! I've never ever seen so many goosebumps before.

Ok, that was the Bitcher for you... Made mashed potatoes this morning... I bought special cheese just for this. UK Red Leicester. Oueh! Délicieux! You'll find it in Fairprice. Now I know how it feels when my mom is cooking in the kitchen and we run in and prance around and sample her fried tau kwa. I also know how it is when someone shuffles in and starts to mumble endlessly on how to make your dish better.

Watched 'Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy' while having lunch. Man you should catch it. It's hilarious.
Because of my flu and my much-much-more-than-enough lunch, I struggled to keep my eyes open to finish 'Hitchhiker' and after that plonked on the bed to KO for three and a half hours. Also good, so I can take the opportunity of a silent night, holy night to get my essay off its stupid ass.

orchestrated by Renhao at 10:19:00 pm
© 2004-2007. All rights reserved. You have been warned.