Flagship blog of the Fortissimo Blog Group


Wong Renhao

Date of Birth:
28 August 1988

~Full time student
-St. Hilda's Primary
-Victoria School
-UB-SIM Ba. Comm.
~Part time software technician (Ba. ITech)
~Tenor-in-training, though it most probably won't work out
~CMI Grade 2 piano player
~Learning guitar

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Revelation of Grace
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Chong Yi
CiPing & Wilbur
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Jason Aw
Jon(athan) Sam(raj)
Lyrical Revelry
HRH Mano and her Blisters
Shu Yun
(Ying) Zhi


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April 2006
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July 2006
August 2006
September 2006
October 2006
November 2006
December 2006
January 2007


Note: I will post using the name Renhao. Any other variation of my name or moi is not me.


Happy Helium New Year
Dumb norwegian blond
the flying lawnmower
Piece of Mind - Vancouver Film School (VFS)
Punishment in a haunted house -gaki no tsukai-
The Last Knit
chlorine and alcohol
The Tonight Show w/ Jay Leno -- Phony Photo Booth
Imperial Orchestra
Male Restroom Etiquette
Crazy Frog vs. Call On Me
Der Fuehrer's Face
School Rumble Clip
The Mind Of Mencia
Kotaro Oshio - Super Mario
Best card trick in the world
Whose Line Is It Anyway 26
Kotaro Oshio - Fight!!
Best of Peter
Another Funny Japanese Prank Show
Silent Library 3
Japanese Toilet Prank
Japanese Mission Impossible: Ski Resort spa prank
Family Guy Wheel of Fortune
Always Look on the Bright Side of Life
Miss Swan at a gay bar
Miss Swan (900)HOT-SWAN
Another David Copperfield
[Bakafish] Hard Gay Ramen English Subtitles
[Bakafish] Hard Gay Father's Day English Subtitles
Crazy Asian Mother by Erick Liang
English Conversation.
Teletubbies Uncensored
South Park Blame Canada
Jay Leno's Photobooth Prank 2
Jay Leno's Photobooth Prank 1
Steve Vai - Tender Surrender
Tatiana and Maxim Ice Skating
MJ's Choco Factory
Japanese Girls Freak Out
Funny Wake Ups
Boy Gets Scared
No More Wanking
Jesus Dancing Weird
Little Diva

Excited Pokemon Kid from Youtube.com

Sunday, November 26, 2006

Fantastic piece of CGI. If mere graduate students can do this, I don't see why the folks behind Death Note can't do the same for Ryuk. They're supposed to be professionals for goodness' sake with the best software on the market. Disappointing.

orchestrated by Renhao at 10:22:00 pm
© 2004-2007. All rights reserved. You have been warned.

Playing with Gas and a Sweet Made of Strange Shit
Friday, November 24, 2006

So I thought it would be fun to try out the Diet Coke-Mentos experiment for real, since I brought a bottle back from today's pizza party. I had one (ONE! ONE!!!) Mentos left and after seeing the amusing reaction with Sprite (significant amount of bubbling), I decided to go against my worry and leave the Diet Coke bottle unopened till I got home. See, the bottle was seriously hard, there was so much gas built up, and it seriously didn't help that the bus kept rocking, and making the liquid shake back and forth. But anyway, to retain the best possible reaction with what little materials I have, I kept the bottle sealed and fresh.

So expecting a mediocre reaction with just one Mentos, I unsealed the bottle, right in front of the computer that I am typing this with now, thought hajime-masu, and plopped it in.

There was nothing I could do. The reaction was split second. And not only that, it was unbelievably strong. The fountain kept itself at a good 10cm height for three agonizing seconds.

Considering it's a near explosive reaction we are talking about here, three seconds is really. really. really. LONG.

All I could do was grip the bottleneck helplessly, where seconds before I was attempting to cap up the moment I saw the velocity with which the foam rised, while Diet Coke flushed onto my table, the floor around me (1-metre radius ok), my keyboard, mousepad, even screen, seat, Crumpler.

It was death and destruction man. For three seconds, anarchy took gleeful reign.

Please. Do not try this at home.

Not at your computer. If you will die without trying it out, do it at your kitchen sink. And if there is even a slightest chance of a disaster, bathroom sink it is. It took me my shirt, pants, and another A1 size rag to mop up the mess. It be no funny.

orchestrated by Renhao at 6:51:00 pm
© 2004-2007. All rights reserved. You have been warned.

Hey Peepers
Tuesday, November 21, 2006

I haven't been blogging, but hey. Doesn't really matter right? No one reads my blog anyway.


So after Oprah ended, The Tyra Banks Show now takes her place. I do admire her as a supermodel. She...

Okay I don't follow these things everyday. Although I must admit I'm quite drawn to the Ellen Degeneres Show. The laughter isn't canned there. Or hey, maybe they play a laugh track to stimulate the audience into laughing. Unlikely though.

So ya Tyra. She is charismatic, for one thing. On the runway she radiates life, unlike the size-0 models who look like they're only modelling because they would be forced to eat Mac's for breakfast lunch dinner otherwise. And she's proactive with stuff like breast cancer and all that.

So on the show aired today she was exposing the dangers of Internet chatrooms. They showed footage of her going into chatrooms posing as a 14-year old, and dirty old men showing their dicks on webcam.

And just to show how prevalent it was, she did it again. Live on the show. And again we got a dick on the show.

Then. The idiot asked to see her. On her cam.

So she said ok.

Uncovered her cam, facing the audience, and showed it to him.

He signed off immediately.


So think twice about showing your cock ah next time, if any of you readers actually do that.

You sick fuck.

Oh speaking of dirty stuff, a few of you know that I'm taking an interest in scanlated (for uninitiated: scanlated or scanslated = scanned + translated) manga. And having no Palm like G, nor wishing to have to go through the trouble of zooming each page to a readable size and then unzooming to go to the next page, I decided to print them out.

Yes. Print. Four pages on one A4 page. I rock. You... well maybe not.

So my recycled paper was my dad's printed material, with a hole punches. So I just reversed the order such that when the manga came printed out it was bindable. Now I knew my father had those file thingys you could lock and make a sort of bind. So I went to search his drawers.

When I found it, I saw at the back of that particular drawer were two packets of peanuts and kidney beans. This was his stock of snacks to keep him awake during his long nights and dull afternoons. I've always wondered how there was such a constant replenishment of these things in his trusty little container. I'd expect it to be empty sometimes.

Finding his snacks hidden in there really felt like finding your dad's porn stash.

I just hope he doesn't find mine.

Snack stash, not porn.

orchestrated by Renhao at 8:40:00 pm
© 2004-2007. All rights reserved. You have been warned.

I Gave Hitler Too Much Airtime
Friday, November 17, 2006

What a week I officially screwed up my last exam.

Yes, COM317 involves a persuasive speech as our last exam and my utter, lonely failure leaves me wondering about my grades. In all fairness I didn't prepare, really. I was writing my card notes in the first half of class while the others were doing their speeches. But to screw up that badly as to be stopped by Dr Sachs halfway... never expected it.

More indication that I should indeed join Toastmasters.

I did, but due to paternal objection I had to pull out.

So shiat.

After the speech I met Lirong and Andrea Ng at the 1st level carpark and Lirong went, 'RENHAOOO! WOOO~! LET'S GO OUT!!! :D:D:D'

Andrea: 'YA YA! I DRIVE! LET'S GO!'
'Dunno... just go out la. Catch a movie or something! WOOO~!'

And in a rash decision, I agreed.

It's not that I was fried by my parents when I got home, I duly informed them, vague as it was, that I would be having dinner with my friends. Still my plan was to go home and wallow in anime.

I did have alot to catch up on. Well, I do. I have 32 running animes. It's fun, but not easy. Many times Ryan would go, 'Hey did you watch ep X of anime X?' And I'd be like, 'THE HELL?? I didn't see it on Baka!'

Baka is, of course, Baka-Updates.com, just about the best site for tracking new releases. The only thing hard to find are batch torrents of like for example, the complete episodes plus movie of Fullmetal Alchemist. That one you'll have to go to the other usual torrent search sites, which runs the risk of turning in Mongolian subtitles. It's really not funny to discover that sort of error after spending a month downloading 8.5GB. Baka only tracks new releases of English subs.

Ya so ANYWAY, we went to Cineleisure to watch Flushed Away. I like the slugs best.. damn cute can? But man... it was a record time for a movie. 60 minutes and we were out. And then after that, after walking around Cine, mostly with the two girls examining figurines curiously behind me while I was ogling at all the anime characters. There was this shop which sold... man. Alot of stuff. A life-size (plastic) replica of the Naruto ninja knife thingy... kanna I think they called it, keychain replicas of Zabimaru and Tensa Zangetsu (no Senbonzakura wtf! Blasphemy!). Also! Death Notes! And they were not too expensive. If I remembered the big scale replica was 9.90? Really not bad. And the cover is like those cheap leather sort...

I told the girls I'd just go back and buy over the whole store. Oh they have cosplay costumes for Naruto and Bleach - all 12 squad numbers for taicho costumes.

And! As we walked along, my mouth fell to the floor as I saw stacks. And stacks. And stacks! Of Hard Gay Kikki Ippatsu! If you haven't already guessed, it was the cute toy featured in the Hard Gay TOMY episode. If you still dunno what I'm talking about, you might be deprived.



OH WELL. I'll just come back when I have too much money.

We settled at Cartel for dinner. And we took a long time to decide what we wanted (spoilt for choice lor seriously). The service was good though. I think it was the first time that we were asked if we wanted bread. Also they took quite some time to deliver the food. And the cheese was what I call the implicit smell type, a very packed in, concealed taste, as opposed to certain other cheddars which go on an all out assault on your nostrils and tastebuds. So even though I quite accidentally dumped a whole cuplet (you know those little... cups they give for vinegar and oil... I call them cuplets. And I put cheese in them. And when I was tapping the cheese to sprinkle on my dissapointingly small portion of spaghetti, I knocked everything onto my plate). No matter. It was a just-nice taste in the end.

Great outing, but I totally blew my cash on it. Lucky it was spare cash. All the same, I'm left with no safety net now.

Oh well.

But today I gor reimbursed for the money spent in StompAIDS and well, at least I feel a little safer with $20 buffer. Better than hoping coins would save you should anything arise.

I really should learn not to spend too much. Really. Maybe whatever extra cash I get from my visiting auntie or whatever, I should just splash it on something I want, that nice Zara belt or an x-Fi sound card, so I wouldn't live my next few weeks in luxury then find myself flailing when my cash runs out. Freaky.

orchestrated by Renhao at 10:45:00 pm
© 2004-2007. All rights reserved. You have been warned.

Spread the Word
Monday, November 13, 2006

RoG is updated. Finally. In case I haven't blogged for so long that you people forgot what RoG is, it's my Christian blog, accessible on the left menubar.

Please notify your Christian friends about the existence of RoG and encourage them to have a look. I'm not out for fame, not when it comes to God's Word, but I feel all the same that not enough people are reading RoG, even though I'm almost equally certain that there are people out there who need to read and know things that I have put in there. As you might have noticed I don't even bother delivering posts on a regular basis. I write as and when I'm moved to. And there are still alot of things I need to know about my God, but I highly doubt He reveals things to me, or any Christian for that matter, if He thinks that enough people already know that message.

Please spread the Word.

orchestrated by Renhao at 9:42:00 pm
© 2004-2007. All rights reserved. You have been warned.

Durex Global Sex Survey '05
Thursday, November 09, 2006

After perusing through the GSS'05, I noticed that Singaporeans advocate most an educatory stand. We (myself not included) constantly voted for options like invest more money in sex education, educate people more about sex, and the like. Now I have no problem with that, but there are in my opinion better solutions available in the survey. Consider the following:

What developing countries need most in terms of sexual health

Money to support sex education....................................34%
Greater access to condoms..............................................23%
Greater access to drugs/vaccines for HIV/AIDS..........14%
Money towards the care of people with HIV/AIDS.......6%
Help to encourage women to uphold their rights..........8%
Family planning..................................................................11%
Encourage people to abstain from sex till married........4%

Money to support sex education.......................................27%
Greater access to condoms.................................................15%
Greater access to drugs/vaccines for HIV/AIDS.............12%
Money towards the care of people with HIV/AIDS..........7%
Help to encourage women to uphold their rights...........11%
Family planning....................................................................17%
Encourage people to abstain from sex till married.........11%

And this:

Best way to raise awareness of safer sex

A sexual health awareness day..............................................9%
Posters highlighting the importance of safer sex.............10%
Free condoms where high STI/unplanned pregnancy....32%
Encourage government to discuss safer sex issues..........17%
Teaching materials for schools and HCPs.........................28%
None of these............................................................................4%

A sexual health awareness day..............................................11%
Posters highlighting the importance of safer sex................9%
Free condoms where high STI/unplanned pregnancy.....25%
Encourage government to discuss safer sex issues..........23%
Teaching materials for schools and HCPs.........................28%
None of these............................................................................4%

Yes I wanted to align them all but I'm getting so much problems so forget it. As long as the values aren't cluttered with the options.

The first one. Singaporeans are choosing education over greater condom access and that to HIV/AIDS vaccines. And a measly 11% advocated abstinence. A tenth of Singapore believes in abstinence. More than double that amount prefers protection. Now even if you believe personally that oral sex can be excluded from the definition of pre-marital sex, the fact remains that you are still exposing yourself to bodily fluids, which is just about the best way for AIDS to spread, unless you make a blood pact or lick wounds. In which case I think you should be put to sleep, but I also believe in giving chances, so go see a doctor. And a shrink. Now even if abstinence means that you have to resort to masturbation, I would rather fight that habit than die slowly. You can't even fight AIDS. You can only watch yourself rot and die.

I sound so StompAIDS.

Again in the second survey question shown. Majority goes to teaching materials, when there are choices such as free condoms and encouraging the government to discuss safer sex issues available.

Let me reiterate that I am all for education. But what I think Singaporeans don't understand is that education takes time to inculcate. You don't just tell your child 'Don't lie' once and he'd go 'Oh um ok sure.' and stop lying forever. Sex education isn't going to sink in after one graphic presentation on pornography and AIDS. Education takes time, years, to instill firmly. And what we need now isn't so much a need to instill moral values of abstinence (I said 'isn't so much', before you decide to start firing me), but more immediate and present action. Offer free condoms in red-light districts (I think we're paying for R&D costs anyway... $1.50 for 5 rubber bands worth of rubber talk about overpricing). Knock up some posters. Get the government to talk. Subsidize HIV vaccines (didn't even know there were haha). Unleash a hard sell campaign promoting abstinence.

Now some of these. Campaigns, posters, governmental discussions, yes they can be considered education. But these are more direct, reaching the masses, with a simple sticky message (at least that's their aim). The kind of teaching Singaporeans seem to favour is school-integrated education, which like I said we don't have time for. Now again I say I am not against education, I think we just need to focus more on impacting people now, presently, pronto. By all means start that sex ed program that people want. If we can instill such values in our youths, we won't have to waste time and money (I just pulled through StompAIDS and man, campaigning isn't exactly buying Play-Doh) printing banners to hang up, knocking up stages and engaging people to MC, gig, act, etc. Think of the areas the money would be able to go to then. Maybe in the future we won't have to suffer transport fare increases in exchange for no apparent improvement on our public transport.

orchestrated by Renhao at 9:10:00 pm
© 2004-2007. All rights reserved. You have been warned.

StompAIDS Events Day 3

I was glad when Derek or Hans said that today's guitars will be plugged to the mixer directly. I'm not tyrannical, but you have to have control as a soundman to ensure the best sound you can come up with. That's why as much as possible I'd like all instruments, with the exception of drums for smaller venues, to be miked/plugged up.

When the band was preparing for their first item halfway into today's events, a young guy no more than 30, came up to me from behind and said, 'Are you aware that you are not allowed to play until 1.15?' And I looked at him, and because I expected the people whom we've been working with all along from Student Care to talk to me/us if there were any problems, I was thinking in my heart, 'Who the fuck are you... get lost.'

'People are having exams now, we have been receiving complaints.'
'You are from?'
'Student Care.'
'... Where's Caroline? Andy?'
-keeps quiet-

In the end we had to push it back. And when we could do so no longer, we had to choose Derek's original because it was apparently the softest piece. And that guy came back and asked me to lower the volume, so fed up with having to adjust the instruments, I sighed and dropped the master volume by almost 10 marks. It was a relief for them to finish, because honestly man, I don't want to keep disturbing those upstairs, nor keep receiving complaints. I have only the guy from Student Care to get upset with, which is not fair, because they have the unfortunate job of relaying such messages. I was already preparing for a personal visit from an invigilator upstairs, whom I'll blast for the noise created during International Student Week, regardless of whether RMIT organized it or not. Doubt they did. The guy told me the second time he came to the mixer that 'I think the feedback from the Hall is that the band is ok but the talking is too loud.'

I had WTF written all over the expression I gave him. And Zhi gave me the same look when I told her the story later. Ridiculous.

At least when the band did their second piece, I could grant them a proper performance, since it was in fact 1.15 sharp. And it felt really great to open all barriers for their last song Smells Like Teen Spirit. Hans was not bad at rallying the crowd. Well, it was mostly UB anyway, so they'd go wild at the slightest cue. You feel so into the music, like when after the clean intro, I suddenly upped the guitar volume so that the next distorted phase of the song blasted from the speakers. And I was glad to hear that Ben Chen's bass had a beautiful sound, because I EQed just about everything plugged up.

Which also explains why I froze in mixed feelings of anger and a sense of impending doom when Isa came half an hour late and plugged his guitar into his own amp. Right across the stage so it had little chance of reaching my mixer.

Cannot liddat sial a-bang.

So anyway, I lowered the midbass and upped the treble, resulting in a lovely twang sound from the bass. If you've heard Smells Like Teen Spirit, you know the bass isn't anything special. But the riff is really good, and the accented sound brought its uniqueness out. Hurray for EQ and me!

As the song ended, I felt a great boulder of worry and tension lift, and a flood of joy rushing in to take its place. The soundman's nightmare of relentlessly monitoring every single instrument, shifting volumes accordingly, was over, and I had pulled it off, spectacularly if the cheers were anything to go by. They were really more than just cued.

We did it.

OH again, THANK YOU VERY MUCH all those who came to support!!
Kaiyan for helping with sound (STILL GOT FEEDBACK LA!!)
Lirong and gang, our cheering kickstarters (WHOOOO~!).
Mano Guech Ryan Graham Rocky... and many others I didn't see personally but I know it took much more than these 5... thank you for pushing flyers and lucky draw coupons into people's frightened faces.
Juliana, for shamelessly sticking our logo stickers on bewildered passerbys' arms, for rambling on and on before 12pm to draw attention (WO BU HUI JIANG HUA YU)
Mariani and all those who tended to the banner (LAI LAI LELONG AH WOI!)
And of course, The Killerjanes, even though there were more guest stars than actual members (WHACK ONLY LA FUCK).

Man, without you guys, everyday would have been like the second day. -shiver-

This is one of the few times that being a small, budding group in SIM has been a huge advantage to us. We are small and we all know each other, and the support that we were blessed with was just amazing. My friend from RMIT dismissed the upcoming group with 'Oh I dunno those people.' Graham's brother didn't even know about StompAIDS.

So now we wait.

orchestrated by Renhao at 9:41:00 am
© 2004-2007. All rights reserved. You have been warned.

StompAIDS Events Day 2
Tuesday, November 07, 2006

Today was our horror day. Our event time, 12-1pm, was right smack in the middle of our COM classes, so our friends could not support us with their numbers and let the magic of social proof take over. We didn't want a band after the complications faced yesterday. Damn worried.

Today however we started by installing the windmills we bought yeshterday, and releasing our rubber duckies. We counted we had 20+-. At the end of the day, less than 10 were present. Also we put all the hearts, broken and healthy, into their respective places, and installed the styrofoam coffin too that said Don't let AIDS be your final bed mate. Not bard at all.

Our friends have been really supportive, coming down immediately after lesson to create a crowd, and going wild with screams at my signal (woo Lirong woo~). After the event we stayed till evening where as predicted the after exam crowd added quite a number of signatures to our now messy banner.

So yay.

orchestrated by Renhao at 10:25:00 pm
© 2004-2007. All rights reserved. You have been warned.

StompAIDS Events Day 1


Today marks the day I start admiring May and Choy.

Not because they are hot, or because they have shades the size of anime character eyes. Not because they are celebrities either.

But because of their professional display of experience.

After their introduction, the moment they walked on stage, Jose said 'Ok for this game we'll need 12 people.' And Choy walked right back down the stage and in slightly over a minute, the stage was packed.

This is probably the first time I've witnessed celebs wield their power and status so... elegantly. It's like Choy goes 'Would you like to join?' And she'd just grab the arm, male or female, either pull him a couple of steps forward or walk him/her halfway to the stage, then she's off for the next victim.

Nobody could resist.

The condom game, surprisingly or unsurprisingly, attracted the most people. And Jose and Andrea Lim helped immensely too. Very easy-going and my God they switch tracks faster than you can say 'Oh shit'. Everything's fine by the time you do.

I think I would have been ok, but there were so many problems with the band... people having exams complain... sound system was bad... that by the time we were finished I was staying awake on borrowed time.

Well luckily I recharged by the power of talking cock. Our first target was our third poster ad, with the guy's head in his hands. One night stand becomes one's nightmare.

We said that that wasn't true. This is why the couple was in that position. M18~

Janet and Aaron had never felt so high before. They had had over an hour of saucy foreplay, and they decided that it was just nice to finish off. Take our time, they agreed, but not too much time.
Aaron was towering over Janet as he prepared to end it big. He had saved his performance for tonight, as a seal of their love for each other. Without warning, Aaron moved downwards, causing Janet to scream uncontrollably in ecstasy. Aaron abandoned all sense of control as he slammed repeatedly into Janet, grunting and groaning loudly. As he felt himself building up, he pushed even harder.
'Oh! Uh... YES....' Aaron moaned. Suddenly he lost all control of his groin and climaxed, to Janet's utter delight.

'YES AAR.... who's Kelly?'

And that's how they ended up. His head in his hands, her fuming.

'Oh shit...'
'Sonofabitch player...'

And then there was the condom packing... When Andrea complained about it's nobrain-ness, I replied sagely,
'Packing condoms is never fun,
work from morn till set of sun.'

You know it's one of those phrases you can use all the time.

'Hey Renhao! What did you do in school today?'
'Packing condoms is never fun....'
'So Mr Wong, what did you feel was your greatest achievement during this campaign?'
'... work from morn till set of sun.'

Very very useful indeed.

orchestrated by Renhao at 7:45:00 am
© 2004-2007. All rights reserved. You have been warned.

Sunday, November 05, 2006

Look ye look ye, the genius of mankind.

orchestrated by Renhao at 7:17:00 am
© 2004-2007. All rights reserved. You have been warned.